"When in Tassie"

Lessons I learned in Tasmania

1. Beer is a territorial issue.

Cascade vs. Boag's 

On Friday April 1st, we walked to the Cascade Brewery outside of Hobart. For $15 we went on a tour of the factory and got three samples of our choice. Note first that we got to choose ANYTHING that Cascade brews including brews, ciders, and soft drinks from years before that are no longer sold. Note secondly that by 'sample' they mean almost a pot of each drink you choose. Pretty generous! On the tour I learned that Cascade (originating in southern Tassie) used to own Boag's (northern Tassie) before Boag's had a revolution and forever more the two are competing beer companies. Our guide was hilariously ripping on Boag's for a good portion of the tour, and even confessed that when she stumbled upon free Boag's at a festival she wanted it but couldn't bring herself to do it for two reasons. 1. stubbornness. 2. she was wearing her Cascade uniform. I thoroughly enjoyed the Brewery tour, the samples, and the taste test we did (and the hat we won for identifying four of six beers by taste!) and I 100% recommend the tour to anyone who goes to Tasmania. Cascade is great!

(But between you and me, I prefer Boag's.)

2. Tasmanian night life is for mommys and daddys.

The Kids are Out Tonight

I loved staying at The Pickled Frog because it's an extremely social hostel. Our group of five multiplied into a mob of Americans, Europeans on holiday, serious backpackers, a girl just beginning to learn English, and traveling circus performers, one with dreads longer than my legs. We decided to go out and check out the Hobart bar and club scene. Walk into the bar and the first thing I notice is we're the youngest ones in there. Next thing I notice is we're the youngest ones in there by a lot. Everyone in there was with their spouses on the dance floor. Wearing club attire. Grinding. Moms and dads gone wild. Well we didn't care and danced along with the moms and dads until we decided to check out another bar. And as we were walking outside, we passed a drunken mom who took a look at us and told her husband that "the kids are out tonight." What a relief! Here I am thinking I have to worry about adult things like life and money and jobs, but I'm apparently still a kid. A kid who can buy a drink. Life is great!

3. Tasmanian dancers are violent

The Ninja Dancer

What I didn't mention about the first bar was that I got danced on by a girl who may have been wearing shiny stilts or a pick axe instead of heels. She destroyed my foot. Then an overzealous mommy whacked me in the back of the head in an attempt to dance sexily for her husband. I'd say it didn't work but he seemed to like it so what do I know. Only seconds later he was on the floor doing some John Travolta inspired thing for her, tripping everyone else on the dance floor in the process. She didn't like this as much as he liked her mosh pit worthy moves. 

But this is all a warmup act for the Ninja Dancer we discovered at the next bar.

He had the tact and agility of a ninja and the moves and shamelessness of a dancer. From the bottom up, he pointed his right toe, and crossed his right foot over his left so his knees were crossed like he had to pee. He shook his hips like a single lady from this position. His left hand was not on his hip but on his waist so he could hunch his back (very couture) his right hand at his mouth so he could bite his index finger. Add some batting eyelashes and this is the groove. His plan of attack is to sneak over to any girl who seems willing (or nonchalant, ambivalent, nonviolent, or vulnerable - these are all good options) and bust out the move right behind her and wiggle the hips and bite the finger until she looks. Then, and only then when she's looking, do the eyelashes start. I had a lot of fun watching him. Especially when he tripped over a couch, turned the fall into a forward roll flipping over the couch and onto the floor, from where he popped up into the wiggle effortlessly. I could learn some skills from him.

4. I have a small fraction of stamina, which is significantly more than I thought I had.

Racing the Sun

We drove two and a half hours North to go see Wineglass Bay. We stopped at the waterfront, excited to have finally arrived at our destination, and took 298587126303 pictures and spent some time watching the sun start to set before deciding to head out. On our way back to the car we passed a sign and had a horrible realization: we were at Cole's Bay, not Wineglass Bay!!! We scurried over to another sign where we learned that Wineglass Bay was an hour and a half hike roundtrip. With the sun setting and no flashlights, we made the only rational decision to be made. We would run up the mountain to the lookout and make it back before dark. (What, you thought we'd give up and go home???) This sounded like the worst idea in the world, but we drove all this way so we had to see it, right? And as Christa and Jake frequently reminded us, "when in Tassie..."

We made it to the top in 25 minutes, and saw one of the most beautiful sights I have ever seen: the sun setting over Tasmanian mountains surrounding a beautiful lake with perfectly white sand.

And if this wasn't incredible enough, we hiked back to the car in the reflected light of the sun setting over Cole's Bay.

5. Tasmanians eat dinner before 8pm or starve.

The Best Meal Ever

After running up and down to and from the Wineglass Bay lookout point, starving was a massive understatement when describing our condition. The closest town to the national park was Bicheno, 40 minutes away (which beat out waiting until Hobart which was 2.5 hours away). We began our drive just hoping that this town would even have a restaurant. Getting there was an issue because wallabies kept hurling themselves in front of the car. We narrowly missed around fifteen suicidal wallabies and two disoriented kangaroos, not to mention the scattered bodies of the not-so-fortunate wallabies, kangaroos, possums, and echidna in the road. It looked like a war zone. We did end up pancaking one wallaby, but it was already dead and there was no way around it. I'll spare you all the vivid details feeling the crushing of a cute fluffy animal's skull beneath your tires. 

We arrived in Bicheno not long past 9pm, and all food was closed. We went to the beachside visitor center, which still had an open giftshop. They informed us that all food closes at 8pm. This proved to be true pretty much everywhere. Drunk food included. (If you get drunk munchies and plan on going out in Tassie, pack yourself a snack before going to the bar because food doesn't exist after 8pm). I think they felt bad for us because they agreed to make us food for takeaway. I had Blue-eyed trevalla, a Tasmanian deep sea fish, crumbled instead of battered (just to shake things up) and chips. Incredible end to an incredible day. We ate in the car. It was the best meal ever. I don't know if it was because the food was amazing, or because I was starving and tired, or because I had a great day in Tasmania, or a combination of all of the above.

Aussie -> English Translator

To celebrate the halfway point of my adventures here, I have finally published my translator though it is still a work in progress.

Aussies are notorious for their use of slang, only some of which makes sense. While there is a lot more slang to be found on the internet, I have only recorded the words I have seen or heard in my time here. Feel free to add anything you've heard or you think I may have missed!

***Note: much slang is produced using this formula
          word - all but the first syllable + a or o = slang version
examples:
     pedophile -> ped -> pedo
     ambulance -> amb -> ambo
     garbage man -> garb -> garbo

***Note: much slang is produced using nonsensical rhymes

examples:

     frog and toad -> hit the road
     pork pie -> lie


Here is a format key to this translator:
when Aussies say this word or phrase - it really means this American word or phrase
     Here is a sample sentence with the correct usage of said Aussie word or phrase, with the term of question printed in bold.

A

ambo - ambulence

    Call the ambo now!!!

arvo - afternoon
     call u in the arvo :)


Aussie (also spelled Ozzie) - Australian
    I love Aussie girls, but Aussie guys tend to be really forward.

B

barbie - BBQ
    Throw some prawns on the barbie.


barrack for - cheer for
     You can't sit with me at the footy match unless you barrack for Carlton.


bathers - swimsuit
     Don't forget your sunblock and bathers!


biscuit - cookie
     Who stole the biscuit from the biscuit jar?


bloody - very
     He's a bloody good drinker!


bogan - trailer trash
     You're as sunburned as a bogan!


brekkie - breakfast
     Running late - no time for brekkie.


budgie smuggler (a budgie is a type of small bird) - man's tight speedo-like bathing suit
     Check out that fat man in the budgie smuggler!

bush - Australian flora
     Watch out for snakes in the bush!


bushwalk - hike through the Australian flora
     It's a lovely day for a bushwalk.


bushbash - off trail hike through the Australian flora, usually running or racing
     I don't know if I'm brave enough to go bushbashing.


bring a plate - potluck
    When you are told to bring a plate, it really means to bring a plate with food to share on it.


BYO - bring your own (refers to anything, not just drinks)
     This hostel description says that towels are BYO.

C

chemist - pharmacist
     I like my drugs fresh from the chemist.

chips - fries or chips
     The other night, my roommate fried up some great chips!

click - snap 

     If you can't dance, just click your fingers to the beat and pretend you're really into the music.

college - on campus houses, very much like Harry Potter
     I frequently hit up Ormond College for free meals.


course - major/degree of study
     People in the engineering course party hard.


crisps - American chips 
     I'll take a bag of chicken salt crisps to go with my sandwich.

D

dinkum (sometimes "fair dinkum") - genuine, true
     He's a dinkum Aussie if I ever saw one.


dirties - dirty looks
    He's been giving me dirties all night.


docket - bill, receipt
     Excuse me, you forgot your docket!


down under - Australia and New Zealand
     As a kid, I loved The Rescuers Down Under.


dropbear - fictional bush predator that Australians use to scare tourists
    Check the trees for dropbears before turning your back... :evil laugh:

dry as a dead dingo's donger - dry, arid
    It used to be a lake, but now it's dry as a dead dingo's donger.

E

esky - cooler

     I bought a new esky for the picnic. 

F

fairy floss - cotton candy
     I haven't had any fairy floss here yet, but I see it at all of the markets and fairs.

flake - shark

     Most Melbourne fish and chips is made with flake.


flat white - latte coffee hybrid
     I can't believe how expensive a small flat white is.

footy - Australian Rules Football

     Footy is far superior to American Football.


fringe - bangs
     I can't decide if I want a side fringe or a blunt fringe.


frog and toad - hit the road
   Let's pack up and frog and toad.

G

garbo - garbage man
     Garbos get paid more here than I ever will.


G'day - hello
     G'day, mate!


give it a go - take a shot
     I've never done this before, but I'll give it a go.


goon - cheap boxed wine with unreasonably high alcohol content
     The last thing I remember was the goon.

H

handle - beer glass with a handle (not the same as a handle of hard alcohol)
     In Australia I can drink a whole handle by myself without coming close to dying.


heaps - a large quantity, used like the American 'tons'

     I stretched heaps, but I still pulled a muscle.

hammys - hamstrings

     The doctor told me if I loosen up my hammys my back will feel better.

hook turn - when driving, a turn in which you need to get to the furthest left lane in order to turn right
    I don't plan on attempting a hook turn while I'm here.

hot chips - fries
     I could go for a burger and hot chips any day any time.


how are you going? - how are you doing?

     How are you going?

J

jug - pitcher
     Want to split a jug of Bulmers?

jumper - sweater (usually a light sweater)
     Don't forget to bring a jumper; it gets chilly at night.

L

lolly - candy
     Can I pleeeeaaaase get the bag of lollies????


love - babe

     Hey love, let me buy you a drink.

M

Maccas (sometimes spelled Mackers) - McDonalds

     Let's hit up Maccas for 50 cent ice cream and free wifi.

mate - friend, buddy

    I have a good mate who drives me to school.

mob - large group of kangaroos

    Want to grab a photo of the mob in the field?

mozzie - mosquito

    I'm getting eaten alive by the mozzies!

N

no drama (sometimes "no dramas") - no problem

     Thanks for the ride. No dramas.

note - bill

     Can you break a $50 note?

no worries - you're welcome

     Thanks for your help. No worries.

no wuckas - no fucking problem

     Thanks for the beer. No wuckas.

O

Outback - center arid Australia

     I'm going to the Outback at the end of May.

Oz - Australia

   What type of Oz phone did you get?

P

parma - parmigiana

     Union house has cheap parma specials once a week.

pedo - pedophile

    Back away from the pedo. 

pint - size large beer or cider

     I'll take a pint of Red.

pork pie - lie

    That's a pork pie.

pot - size small beer or cider

     You guys can take shots all you want, I'm happy with a pot of Boags.

R

rage - party

     He can rage all night and still make it to class in the morning.

ranga (derived from orangutan) - redhead (offensive)

     She'd be pretty if she weren't a ranga.

reffo - refugee

     Australia treats reffos horribly.

roo - kangaroo meat

    Roo is great for you because it's so lean, but be careful not to overcook it or it gets tough.

root - to fuck (in all definitions)

    (1) Buy a new ball, this one is rooted. (2) She's a mediocre root.

rubber - eraser
     I asked my mom to buy me a couple of rubbers but she said I'll only need one.


rubbish bin - garbage can

     Your essay belongs in the rubbish bin.

runners - sneakers

    You'll need runners for this hike.

S

Seppo - an American

     You're acting like a Seppo.

sheila - a girl 

    To my understanding, nobody uses the term 'sheila' anymore unless they're a loser or a bogan.

skull - chug

    Skull the rest of your goon and let's go to Turf.

snag - sausage

     Free snags on South Lawn at 1pm!

smoko - smoke break (sometimes used to mean coffee break also)

    She stepped out for smoko, but I can take a message.

strine - Aussie slang/pronunciation (sometimes refers to accent)

    Some tourists can't tell the difference between Aussie strine and a British accent.

sunnies - sunglasses

    Cute sunnies!

swag - roll up camping bedding, like a big sleeping bag

   You can rent a swag for camping in the Outback.

T

Ta - Thanks

     Ta.

Tassie - Tasmania, resident or product of Tasmania

     I had an INCREDIBLE time in Tassie.   

Tea - supper 

    When someone asks you to tea, come ready to eat a meal.

that's alright - you're welcome

     Thanks for breaking my $5 note. That's alright.

thongs - flip flops

    Please stop leaving your thongs in the middle of the floor.

toastie - grilled cheese (often with tomato and/or ham)

    I'll take a toastie and hot chips.

trackies - literally track suit, but has been used to mean sportswear

    This rehearsal will require you to wear trackies.

true blue - genuine Australian, almost patriotic

     I know a true blue meat pie when I taste one.

tutes - tutorials

   I have to leave now or I'll be late for tute.

U

Ugg boots - generic brand non-waterproof boots made of sheepskin to keep warm (American "Fuggs")

     Here Ugg is not a brand, it is a style of shoe.

uni - university

    I study Arts at Melbourne Uni.

ute - utility or pickup truck

   Look out for the ute coming into your lane!

V

vego - vegetarian

     I know this great vego restaurant on Swanston that's owned by the Hare Krishnas.

W

walkabout - an Aboriginal walk, usually for spiritual purpose, that lasts an indefinite amount of time

     I haven't seen him in weeks, ever since he left on that walkabout in the Outback.

whinge - complain

    I have a friend here who made a resolution to whinge less. Good for her.

no wuckas - no fucking problem

     Thanks for the beer. No wuckas.

X

XXXX - pronounced 4X, a beer made in Queensland which is supposed to have four Xs because of it's superior quality

     If beer has to prove that it's good by writing XXXX on it, it probably isn't.

Y

yakka - work

     I can't go out, I've got heaps of yakka to do.

Z

zed - the way Aussies pronounce the letter 'z' when spelling things out

     My last name is Zipkin: zed-ay-pee-kay-ay-en

Gay Marriage Rally

On March 26th, Melbourne united to rally for the legalization of gay marriage. Thousands met in front of the State Library to hear speakers from many different queer departments in Australia.

After the speeches, the two hosts performed Glee's version of "Don't Stop Believing." The entire crowd sang along, myself included despite my hatred of Glee.

The crowd was super excited to march after hearing the speeches, singing along to Glee, and partaking in a sign and donation collection competition. The winners of the sign competition were two guys who were dressed like devils with a sign that said something like "20 years of living in sin" and they won a night in a really trendy Melbourne hotel. The winner of the donation collection won tickets to "Rock of Ages" which is currently showing in Melbourne's Theatre District. After this photo, the crowd left to march and sing for gay marriage down Swanston street!

Although I consider myself an active supporter of gay rights, this was my first rally. Long story short: I cried like a child. It was truly beautiful to see so many different people united together for the same cause. I also loved that the rally was organized without anger or frustration. There was only music and performance and acceptance in the name of equal love. Rather than putting down the politicians, the speakers told us about the true love that they have found in their lives and how they plan on proposing. The message was vocalized in a positive way.

Epilogue

After the rally, I met up with a bunch of friends to go check out the shopping in the Direct Factory Outlets. Thinking nothing of it, I still held my "Equal Love" as I browsed through clothing. In one store, my friend Mellanie and I picked up the same dress and headed towards the dressing room where there was a HUGE line. I got to the front first, and asked the girl working if Mellanie and I could share a dressing room to make the line move faster. 

She took a look at my sign, which up until then I forgot I was holding, and said no.

I couldn't believe it. I was incredibly offended, not because she thought I was a lesbian because I think everyone who knows me knows how little I care about that but because she discriminated based on her rash judgment. This was especially shocking after coming from the rally where there was so much love and openmindedness.

The worker did change her mind in the end. I don't know if she noticed how long the line was or if she realized that she had done something incredibly immoral, but Mellanie joined me in the dressing room a couple of minutes later.

Taking this "walk in someone else's shoes" really did put the rally in perspective for me. I guess going to Brandeis and being part of the theater/dance/arts community at home and in Melbourne makes it easy to forget that homophobia still exists in the real world today. 

What this worker doesn't know is that I'm thankful for the experience. Because now I'm even more motivated to spread the word and join the movement!

Thai Festival

Melbourne is known as the culture capital of Australia, though as I mentioned in earlier posts there really isn't much racial diversity here. When I asked an Aussie friend about this paradox he said that it is true that Melbourne is the culture capital and it is simultaneously true that there is no diversity, because Aussie culture is white.
As racism is a big issue that Australia is currently facing, I was excited to see the celebration of Thai culture in the 8th Annual Thai food and culture festival at Federation Square.

A Thai festival not only meant that my new beloved home was embracing a non-white culture. It also (and more importantly) meant cheap amazing food, music, dancing, swordfighting and cooking demos!

Five things an ignorant American (like myself) can learn at a Thai festival:

Thai people bless and celebrate water

Thai dance contains elements similar to classical Indian dance and classical Chinese dance. Costumes are elaborate. These have tails. The six inch brass finger pieces are unique. They curl away from the hand and are used to accentuate the traditional hand gestures and movements.

Thai girls are beautiful. Thai beauty pageants are boring as hell. I left after 3 of the 13 girls were presented. Thai beauty pageant contestants wear high heels that are so tall and spiky, they should be registered as weapons.

Taro sticky rice looks like moldy porridge but tastes like heaven.

Pretty Thai girls do not like dancing with sketchy drummer boys. The girl on the front left plastered a fake smile on the whole time because creepydrummerboy (downstage right) was all up in her grill while she was trying to dance. She was a pretty dancer, but she looked so miserable.

At the end of the festival, there was a raffle to determine which audience member would win round trip tickets to Bangkok. 

Guess who didn't win.

I don't have the time or money to get over to Thailand yet, so I'm glad that Thailand came to me! It is a beautiful culture and I hope to go in the near future.

Great Ocean Road/Penguin Parade

This past weekend, a group of us spent the weekend on a tour of the Great Ocean Road and Phillip Island. We went through Autopia and had an awesome time!

Great Ocean Road

What: Long stretch of famous beaches and coastal views
Where: Just outside Melbourne
When: Saturday, 12 March

On Saturday we spent the day driving along the Great Ocean Road and stopping to see famous formations such as the Twelve Apostles and London Bridge, beautiful beaches, and a rain forest along the way. It was a perfect warm and sunny day. We really lucked out.




We stopped at a stretch of eucalyptus trees known for its abundant koala population. Sure enough, we saw about six of them! These were the first wild koalas I have ever seen. Fun fact: koalas sleep 18-20 hours a day because their diet provides them with no energy but they insist on keeping their diet. We also saw and fed wild parakeets!

We spent the night in Apollo Bay, where we had an all-you-can-eat meat BBQ before hitting the bar scene where I watched my first Aussie rugby game. It was intense!



Phillip Island
What: An island known for its beauty, nature reserves, and abundant penguins
Where: South of French Island (Southeast of Melbourne)
When: Sunday, 13 March









We made an early start to our day so we could finish the Great Ocean Road before heading to Phillip Island. To get to the island, we took a ferry from Queenscliff to Sorrento and drove the rest of the way. It was a beautiful drive through farmland (Australia sure does love its sheep). Once on the island we stopped at the Wildlife Reserve (a.k.a. PETTING ZOO!!!!) where we fed wallabies, kangaroos, and a brave few (myself included, though not quite so brave) fed emu! I touched a dingo and it licked my hand. There were two albino kangaroos - one baby and one daddy. It must be mating season here because I thought last week's fiaso was bad until this weekend happened. But I don't want to upset my parents so let's just say that there was a kangaroo threesome that involved a female, a male, and an albino male. You can't make this stuff up.

Anyway, it started to rain while we were in the petting zoo, so we went to the chocolate factory to kill time (and diets) before heading over to the penguin parade area. We went for a beautiful hike around the boardwalk where we saw some penguins hiding, ate pizza for dinner (I had curry pizza and crocaroo pizza - my first time eating crocodile, my second time eating roo), and squeezed in to the extremely crowded penguin parade stadium. Yes, stadium. The penguins are so consistent in their habits that there was a stadium built so hundreds of people can see the penguins return to shore and run home after fishing all day. No pictures allowed, unfortunately. After seeing about a hundred penguins, it started raining again so we headed home, exhausted from the incredible weekend.

First-time experiences from this weekend:
- saw wild wallabies, aussie geese, koalas, parakeets, and baby penguins
- saw albino kangaroos
- touched wallabies, kangaroos, dingos, emu
- ate crocodile
- saw the Southern Cross/realized Orion was upside down/realized the moon waxes and wanes in the opposite direction

Other updates:
- I have started rehearsals for the show "No Place Like" by Chris Summers which I am fight choreographing
- I have started my swordfighting tutorials with the fight director here
- I will be teaching weekly contemporary classes for Flare Dance Ensemble members
- I have finished four boxes of Tim Tams since my arrival in Australia
- I go to class

Grampians (Warning: explicit roo photo)

Warning: the second picture is an explicit photograph of kangaroo mating ritual. don't worry, it's science.

The Grampians

Being part of Arcadia's study abroad program, we are all entitled to one free weekend excursion. When I heard that we were going to Grampians National Park (which I had never heard of), I was really disappointed. I really wanted to go to the Great Ocean Road or Phillip's Island. "Grampians" sounds like "grandpas" so clearly this logical association meant that the excursion would be just as exciting as a nursing home. I went because it was free.

It was incredible.

The Grampians is a beautiful national park filled with gorgeous flora and fauna, awesome rock climbing, and rich aboriginal culture. During this trip I did many things for the first time. I went on my first bushwalk (genuine Australian hike), my first real rock climb, played a didgeridoo, painted and threw a boomerang, and saw wild emus!

Here are two stories from this weekend.

Sexaroo

Let me start by prefacing that kangaroos are comparable to deer in the Northeast U.S.. They're cute to look at, but locals hate them. Simply put, they destroy people's gardens if they aren't roadkill first.
We Americans ran outside upon arriving at Acacia Campgrounds in the Grampians to take pictures of the fifty kangaroos across the street. I tell my friend Gwynne that I wonder what sound they make. She replies that she wonders what a kangaroo penis looks like.

Within a mere thirty seconds, we both received answers.

Kangaroos roar. I know that because I heard them roar at each other. There was one kangaroo who had some size insecurities. He was the tiniest one, yet he was going around punching, yes PUNCHING, the other kangaroos in the face as if he had something to prove. The victims included males and females alike, all of whom were minding their own business at the time. He did not punch any joeys, because he only picked on kangaroos his own size or larger. When the other kangaroos left him he punched the air. Poor schitzo.

Shortly after this fiasco, I heard one of my friends shrieking. A male kangaroo was preparing to mate with a female, though she ended up rejecting him. Where was the Planet Earth camera crew?!

False Alarm

Vocabulary words to know

Bush: Australian fauna

Bushwalk: a walk through the Australian bush

Bushbang: an off-trail run through the Australian bush

During our morning bushwalk I asked Lyndon (our leader) about venomous snakes. This is how that conversation went.

Me: Lyndon, are there any poisonous snakes here that we need to worry about?

Lyndon: Not unless you're going to try to eat one.

Me (frustrated with his wit): Lyndon, are there any venomous snakes here that we need to worry about?

Lyndon: Yes.

Me: How can you tell if a snake is venomous?

Lyndon: If it's a snake.

Great. I learn that nearly every snake here is venomous (probably 9 out of 10), and the only way to tell them apart is by counting the scales on the snake's head. But if you're close enough to count the scales, you're probably a goner.

Not long after this conversation, I'm rock climbing and I'm the first to go up so I'm super excited. I'm doing better than I thought I would and I get a little over confident and reach my right fingers over a ledge just within my reach. I feel something shoot out across my fingers and I see a black head with white spots looking down at me. I scream. People on the ground freak out because I am the first on the cliff and they all think something has gone wrong. I pull myself up slowly to get a better look at the situation I'm in and to find a new place for my right hand. Just then, I notice the tiny legs beneath the body of what I thought was a deadly snake. I announce to everyone that it's just a lizard and nothing to worry about. Few people cared, but I was relieved.

Woman vs. Food

Those who know me know how much I love to eat weird and interesting foods. Being in a new country naturally means that I have to try everything. From Korean groceries to "roo" from the butcher to carny food, I'm trying it all! Here are some of my favorite finds so far.

Sausage Fest

Aussies love their BBQs. Within the first week of school there were at least fifteen "barbies" held all over campus to promote academic departments, advertise clubs, and reassure the poor college kids that free food still exists in the world.

Typical BBQ food usually refers to a variety of snags (sausages) eaten on a slice of bread with tomato sauce (their version of ketchup), and veggie burgers. I was fortunate to find sliders at one BBQ, and that was a rare and exciting find. But for the most part, my friends and I lived on free snags for a week - which holds the record for the longest running sausage fest of my life.

Here's a picture of Elle, my roommate, modeling with her sausage. This is not suggestive.

Street Sushi

Those of you who know me well know that I love sushi to a disgusting degree and that I am very picky when it comes to the quality of my sushi. Here, sushi is rarely rolled in front of you but that does not mean it isn't fresh. Sushi here is dirt cheap and among the best quality I've had. This is a photo of some of the best sushi I've found (Sea Salt on Lygon Street). I bought one inari overflowing with crabmeat, caviar, and rice for $2.00 (on left) and one eel roll filled with a generous serving of avocado and veggies for $2.60 (on right). Just two pieces tend to be deceptively filling, and suffice as a standard meal. Behind my rolls, you can see that soysauce comes in tiny squirt bottles shaped like fish so you can squirt your soysauce before each bite if you're eating sushi on the go!

The Korean Twister

(Sounds dirty)

Found at the Suzuki night market, the Korean Twister is a whole potato cut into a spiral and deep fried on a stick. Sounds perfect as is, but it gets better. See all of those plates on the table with different colored powder? These are your flavors. The Korean Twister can be sweet, salty, or savory depending on which flavor you choose. They have everything from salt to curry to chocolate. I got chicken salt flavored. It tasted like chicken soup french fries. $5 death on a stick. So delicious.

Brunetti's

(The Mike's Pastry of Melbourne)

 I had heard about Brunetti's from all of my Australia friends before finally giving it a go out of peer pressure more than anything else. Who said peer pressure was a bad thing? Following everyone's advice was the best decision I could have made. There were so many delicious pastries to try - I felt like a kid in Willy Wonka's factory. I decided to get a couple of small things before making a commitment to one big pastry. It was a great idea. For $2 each, I got a chocolate and nut filled cannoli type thing and a sugar encrusted creampuff. Total adds up to a $4 orgasm. Up top, you can see a free chocolate sample they were giving out. It was a dark chocolate shell filled with passion fruit. Best day ever.

Honorable Mentions

(a.k.a. things I don't have pictures of)

Roo Stew

I decided it would be a really good idea to cook some kangaroo fillets, and in order to learn how to cook them I made friends with the butcher. He said two minutes in a pan on each side and it will be cooked to perfection. And it was. But I didn't like it. Roo is super gamey. So I decided to drown it in curry and surround it with potatoes and onion. Which was good for a bit. And then I got sick of the roo. Elle finished it for me. I'm glad I tried it. Next on my list of Australian animals is emu!

Dutch Pancakes

Elle waited on a huge line at the Suzuki market to get these, and they were totally worth it. About the size of quarters, these sweet, fluffy pancakes tasted like bites of doughy funnel cake. They were covered in chocolate, powdered sugar, whipped cream and came with a scoop of ice cream! Incredible.